"If Utah should ever recognize “gender identity” in the code as
an acceptable definition of gender — “you are who you say you
are” — then what will stop two same-sex people from
marrying?"Same sex marriages are coming to Utah, Gayle.
You'd better get used to the idea, and no, your head won't explode
when it does.
"California actually passed a law, signed by the governor, allowing students
in all grades to choose which bathrooms, dressing rooms or showers they will
use, as well as on which sports teams they will play".I
can't imagine most guys would complain about this.
"...what will stop two same-sex people from marrying? "Same-sex marriages will soon be recognized nationwide anyway, so this is a
very weak argument against anti-discrimination legislation.The issue
of GID (Gender Identity Disorder) is complex and confusing, no doubt. However,
more people need to understand that people don't just "decide" that
they belong to the opposite gender. GID is a very real phenomenon with real
biological roots.1. GID has been connected to multiple biological
factors such as genetics, changes in brains structure, and prenatal exposure to
hormones.2. GID may occur as frequently as 1 in 500 people. 3. Most people diagnosed with GID identify experience gender dysphoria
before puberty.4. Twin studies indicate that GID is 62% heritable,
and therefore has a strong genetic influence. 5. In male-to-female
transsexuals, GID is often associated with genetically-induced androgen
insensitivity.6. Male-to-female transsexuals have been found to have
a typically female stria terminalis (part of the brain), while female-to-male
transsexuals have a typically male stria terminalis.7. In addition,
the hypothalamus in male-to-female transsexuals appears to function as a typical
Be afraid - be very afraid!Here's a novel idea: why not show
respect for everyone's dignity, and instead of having communal locker
rooms, showers, and bathrooms have areas that are more private? Same sex or
different sex, why should anyone be put in a position of being forced to
undress, shower, and dress in front of other people? Why are men forced to
urinate in front of other men?Instead of whining about one or two
people who may make us uncomfortable, let's offer everyone dignity and
privacy. (Oh, and by the way - chances are you would be hard pressed
to tell the birth gender of a pre-transition transgender individual at anything
short of a shower together. Post-transition, you wouldn't even know then.
And opposite sex marriages have been turned into same sex marriages when one
spouse comes out and transitions. Those marriages frequently end in divorce
since the individuals involved are usually not homosexual.)
I don not really care about the marriage part. The part that is disgusting is
the bathroom and locker room uses. Regardless of what you feel you are, if you
have boy parts, use the boys restroom. If you have girl parts, use the girls
Gayle, nothing in utah should stop two same sex people from marrying, except
whatever age or other legal requirements there are to be met.
"The Arcadia Unified School District and the U.S. Department of Education
have reached an agreement to end an investigation into allegations of
discrimination against a transgender student. The student, who has
attended Arcadia schools since kindergarten and is now entering ninth grade, has
identified as a boy from a young age, according to the agency. He began the
transition to living as a male during fifth grade.In 2011, the
Department of Justice received complaints alleging that during the boy’s
sixth and seventh grade years, the district did not allow the student to use
boys' restrooms and locker rooms.The complaints also alleged
that during a district-sponsored overnight camp, the student was not allowed to
stay in a cabin with male students and was instead required to stay in a cabin
separate from all his classmates."(LA Times)
November is Transgender Awareness Month, a month intended to cultivate empathy,
dispel inaccurate stereotypes, and improve understanding of a widely
misunderstood community. How fitting that the DesNews chose to observe the
month with an op-ed that does none of these and only perpetuates ignorance and
stigmatization.By the way, Ms. Ruzicka is over a decade late with
her fears about marriage. In 1999, a transgendered woman from Tooele married a
genetic woman, using and old drivers license that still listed her as male.
This would be Utah's first recognized same-sex marriage (to the best of my
Its only common sense that men should only be allowed in men's restrooms,
and females in females in restroom. And people don't decide
their gender any more than I can decide I am a flying purple dinosaur. There is
a big big difference between what someone IS, and what someone THINKS they
are.I may think I am a flying purple dinosaur.Or a
piano.But I am not.
Contraius, you state that people don't just decide which gender they are.
A sexual predator would in order to gain access to a girls' restroom or
On the front page of ABC News today there is a story of a man who thinks he is a
dog.It is very similar to people who have been deemed one gender by
competent medical professionals, disagree under they claims they think/feel they
are a different gender.No difference.A man in a dress is
a man in a dressA man who has asked doctors to alter his physical
anatomy is a man who has asked a doctor to alter his physical anatomy.People born men and claim to be women are no more women than this man from the
ABC news story is a dog.
People are jobless, People are homeless, People are starving, People are dying, The rich get richer, The poor are getting
poorer, And Gayle is afraid of the 1 in 10,000 chance a
transgendered person might - MIGHT - be occupying the stall next to us.
Its so nice of Gayle and Chris to provide the willfully naive point of view of a
very serious and complex issue.
XX and XY bathrooms. Easy enough solution.
Heh, don't worry Gayle, considering the article about the defense of
Utah's marriage amendment that would definitely be rejected by the court if
that's all they have, same-sex marriage may not be far away anyway. Then
the gender identity thing for marriage won't matter.
Thinking here for a minute....So, it's OK for a homosexual
dressing or undressing in the presences of those he/she already finds sexually
attrative.and yet - a transgended dressing or undressing around
those they are NOT attracted to [and therefor NOT tempted] by?If
this is about sexual temptations or exploitation -- then Gayle is missing it.
@Sal --"A sexual predator would in order to gain access to a
girls' restroom or shower facility."That's part of the
"complex and confusing" issue.People with GID have real
biological bases for their gender dysphoria. It isn't even remotely related
to Chris deciding that he's Barnie. Nonetheless, it is also true that some
people -- like your hypothetical sexual predator -- might take advantage of some
anti-discrimination legislation, depending on how carefully it's
written.Nobody has all the answers, and there is no perfect
solution. But dealing with the issue in a rational way requires that we
recognize GID as a real issue, and not merely dinosaur fantasies.
What gender someone thinks they are is subjective. Their anatomy is
objective.I feel poor, can I skip paying my taxes?What if Bob,
the pedophile, decides to self-identify as a female on Tuesday so he goes into
the girl's dressing room. As Chris said, it is common sense. Everyone
else has a willfully naive point of view of what is going to happen.
How many of you actually segregate your bathrooms in your home? How many have a
separate one for the boys and girls?This really is a non-issue.
@Tekakaromatagi --"Their anatomy is objective."That is often not true.There are many causes and degrees of
"intersex" conditions. Some of them are readily apparent on physical
exam, and some are not. According to the Intersex Society of North
America, roughly 1 in 1500 to 2000 babies have enough ambiguity in their
physical appearance that a specialist in sexual differentiation has to be called
in. Roughly 1 or 2 in every 1000 babies require surgery to make their physical
appearance closer to "normal" expectations, and roughly 1 in every 100
have some noticeable difference from "typical" appearance. And that's only the intersex conditions that cause **external, visible**
changes. Many other conditions cause only internal changes, which may *never* be
detected without specialized testing.As for the chromosomes --
roughly 1 in 1700 babies is neither XX nor XY. About 1 in 1000 is XXY, and some
are XO. And there are other chromosomal abnormalities as well.One
recent well-known example is Steve Crecelius. Steve is a former cop and father
of five. A few years ago he went into the hospital for an unrelated problem.
Ultrasound exam for that problem discovered that "he" has ovaries and a
@danny chipmanyour right that would be an easy solution however like
most overly simplistic solutions it fails to address a the complex reality.
Focusing on only chromosomes ignores the entire body system involved in
developing gender including hormones and brain development among other factors
such as the fact that chromosomes are not always so neatly organized.
We don't need or have "Boy" port-a-potties and seperate
"Girl" port-a-potties.It's either occupied or it
isn't.So, What's the big deal again?
The arguments stated above are similar to the 6 blind men examining an elephant.
All of them stated the truth as they perceived it and yet none of them described
reality. We are still waiting for a coherent and equitable approach to the
"Change how marriage works"? Like women in the kitchen while the men
My college had co-ed bathrooms. There were separate stalls for everything. The
shower stalls locked. I honestly didn't have one problem with it. It made
me a bit uncomfortable at first, but once the novelty wore off, I couldn't
have cared less.
Danny ChipmanLehi, UTXX and XY bathrooms. Easy enough solution.9:40 a.m. Nov. 6, 2013========== Since it's
such an "Easy enough solution"You be sure to have those XX, XY
scanners installed on each and every bathroom.
So it's okay for an employer to fire someone without cause, so Ms. Ruzicka
can be absolutely certain she's not using a bathroom with a transgender
It sounds like it is time for a "Gender Confused" bathroom/locker room.
Set up a bathroom or locker room with whatever equipment would be needed to
accomodate boys who think they are girls or girls that think they are boys, or
boys that say they identify as female that just want to peek at girls in their
underwear, or girls that want to see boys in their briefs so they say they
identify as male, or for boys and girls that are exhibitionists. Let them get
their freak on in their own corner.
Ya know, I watched M*A*S*H for years.Why can't Gayle and
the rest just deal with these situations the same way they did back at the good
old 4077th with Cpl Max Klinger?He's not crazy, so they just
ignore it and get along with life the best they can.
Oh the liberals like Contrarious are here attempting to justify the absurdity of
'gender identity' legislation, a pillar of the radical LGBT agenda,
with straw-man arguments and spurious facts designed to portray this as a
legitimate & valid problem all of us should be deeply concerned with.Nonsense.Once again, a tiny minority of activists are
attempting to push the perceived 'needs' of a statistically
insignificant number of people on the many, forcing society to bend over
backwards to accommodate them. The grand social experiment penned by liberals is
doomed for failure. This is hardly a complex issue, it is a
non-issue. Men are men (or should be) and women are women. Those few
that have problems believing their own biological make-up need nothing more than
a firm kick in the seat of their pants, not being given a green card to live-out
their perverted fantasy at the expense of everyone else.Enough is
Dear Gayle: This is a good op-ed, and you've made your case well. Thank
you for your courage on these issues.
@djhartm --"Men are men (or should be) and women are women.
Those few that have problems believing their own biological make-up need nothing
more than a firm kick in the seat of their pants, not being given a green card
to live-out their perverted fantasy at the expense of everyone else."Never let a few inconvenient facts get in the way of a good prejudice,
right?;-)Here's a few simple questions for you:1. If a person has XXY chromosomes, is that person a male or a
female?2. If a person has XO chromosomes, is that person a male or a
female?3. If a person has ovaries and a uterus, but also has testes
and other male parts that I can't mention here on DN, is that person a male
or a female?4. If a person has the brain of a female and the body of
a male, is that person male or female?5. If your own brain were
transplanted into a woman's body, would you still perceive yourself as
male, or would you perceive yourself to be female?The issue
isn't nearly as simple as you would like to believe.
LDS Liberal,Yes equating the nonsense attempting to be ushered in via SSM &
'gender identity' with a fictitious television show is a strong
argument to simply ignore it.LOL!Fail.And,
SSM is not coming to UT anytime soon, despite what the liberals want so
desperately for you to believe.
BTW -- Isn't the LDS church's offical stance on this issue
not how one "idenfies" him/herself, but on how they act on it,
sexually?Again -- it seems Gayle is crying crocodile tears.It's a moot point, ever for us Mormons.
"In Utah, American Fork High School included anti-discrimination language in
its Gay-Straight Alliance club policy."Heaven forbid! Call the
School Board! We can't have anti-discrimination going on in American Fork,
The anti-discrimination law has two facets. Of course we should be equal in
hiring folks regardless of gender identity (assuming they are capable of the
job's requirements). However, the requirement to provide special
accommodations is the challenge. Providing a "single-use" bathroom for
those who don't want to use their "normal gender" restroom is
something I've seen in hospitals and some businesses. Perhaps the same
could be provided for showers in schools and work. However, the best
thing I've read in these comments is the suggestion to transform all the
restrooms and showers into booth structures that maximize privacy.
@djhartm;When you are one of the "statistically insignificant
number" of people affected, it is not insignificant to you.@DN
Moderators:djhartm's comment that these people "..need
nothing more than a firm kick in the seat of their pants,..." is hate speech
and advocates violence against transgendered people. It violates your rules for
comments and should be removed.
One of my coworkers crossed over from female to male. It was not a big deal. In
fact it wasn't a deal at all. Nobody cares. He walks into the men's
room, goes into the stall, etc. If I'm in there I say hello to him and
don't give it a second thought. I do this because I am a well adjusted
adult with real worries and issues and not an immature uptight person choosing
to hassle people who don't deserve it.Many of the comments
above are totally absurd. If you have not personally experienced this situation,
IMHO you lack perspective and should withhold judgment until you do have
My husband had firsthand experience with this issue at work. A female
co-worker, "Joan" whom he had worked with for a few years began to
undergo her transformation (not surgical) to "John." Human Resources
convened a meeting and informed the dept. than Joan was now going to known as
"John" and would be using the men's restroom. So, whenever
"John" needed to use the restroom, he would simply go into the bathroom
stall and close the door. No big deal. Life continued as it was before.While traveling in Europe my husband has had the experience of using the
restroom while a cleaning lady was mopping the floor directly next to him. I've been in coed restrooms in Europe. The bathroom stalls were
like little closets with full length locking doors. Men and women would go in
the "closet" tske care of their business and wash up in the common sink
area afterwards. Actually this set-up has advantages. Women don't have to
wait in long longs to use the women's bathroom while the men's is
nearly empty. Additionally, mothers and fathers can accompany their opposite
sex children into the bathroom.
This is, indeed, a complicated issue that is further complicated by blending
facts and emotions.I'm honestly surprised, though, that nobody
has commented on Gayle throwing Sen. Urquhart under the bus (and to a lesser
extent, the "two Republican senators, both in leadership positions" who
voted for the bill). I'm pretty sure that was the real motive behind the
article. Oh, using an anecdotal appeal to emotion to stir up the masses was
icing on the cake, but her op-ed was certainly a clarion call to her base to
start mobilizing now to come at these state senators from the right.
That's her M.O., and this article was probably every bit as effective as
her notorious "phone tree".
Chris B--you seem very unwilling to step outside your box and realize that maybe
there are people out there who you might not understand. So you think that there
is a difference between what someone thinks they are and what they actually are?
Remember that for yourself, there may be a difference between a person who
thinks they are a good person and someone who actually is.
My cat thinks it is human. It won't eat cat food, it only eats human
food.There are places that don't permit cats, but my cat should
be permitted because he thinks he is human. He should be welcome in restaurants,
stores, hospitals, churches, schools, etc. To not allow my cat in is
discriminatory and just plain wrong.RedShirt from USS Enterprise,
Danny, and Chris B. WELL STATED! and thanks for the laughs.To those
actually defending the opposing view, thanks for the laughs too.
@BadgerbadgerI see what you did there, but I'll play along,
just for giggles . . .While I'm sure your cat is absolutely
wonderful, I'm afraid that it isn't a fully sentient being, and the
assumption that it thinks it's human is really just you projecting
anthropomorphic characteristics onto it (I would bet my lunch money that cats
don't think in human words, so there is no, "I'm human!" going
on there). In a nutshell, your equating animal rights and animal
self-determination with anti-discrimination rights for at-risk human
demographics is deeply flawed on a number of levels.
@Badgerbadger --"My cat thinks it is human. It won't eat
cat food, it only eats human food."Now if you can just show that
your cat has any of the genetic, physical, or neural characteristics of a human,
you might have a point.Until then, you have none at all.
This is a Fear Based opinion steeped in Control Issues. There is NO example of
any school child who FAKED his/her gender identity just to "peek" at the
opposite sex. These are always individual cases, reasoned and counseled by the
parents and the School Administrators, Doctors and Psychiatrists, in PRIVATE.
No child can FAKE gender identity. Who would volunteer for the Scorn, Physical
Abuse, and Vile Treatment by their Peers? Right. No one. Let the parents,
child and School decide. No one is throwing naked little kids together for
BadgerbadgerMurray, UTMy cat thinks it is human. It won't eat
cat food, it only eats human food.========== Cats are
not protect by the United States Constitution.People are.As
for gender, Gender per se is never mentioned or defined in the
Constituion, However, Women are never mentioned.Do you want to now
argue that Women are not protected under the Constitution because they are not
mention specifically, or can we agree it is inferred?And if Women,
and Blacks, and Asians, and Old, and sick, and dis-abled, Jews, Mormons, are
also inferred as being equaly protect -- why not LGBT?Cats
don't fit into any of those categories.Interesting side note --
because some of us bleeding heart liberals also feel responsible to defend cats
and ALL of God's creations.
"Employers under this anti-discrimination law will have to allow men or
women to shower, etc."?Gayle, you must have mixed this federal
bill with California AB 1266, take some time to read this federal bill before
you jump to such a ridiculous conclusion.
It would be easier to eliminate all public restrooms than to meet these demands.
But the government requires every business to have a restroom with wheelchair
access, etc etc etc. I guess we go with one restroom with a single
toilet and a lock on the door, no stall, so everyone can be protected while
using the bathroom, and there will never be another child or woman or man
attacked in a restroom.Deniers, there are many many many attacks in
public use bathrooms.
As a man I don't see why this matters at all. If someone who is biologicly
a woman, but identifies as a man wants to use the stalls in the same bathroom
i'm in I don't care even a little bit.
Contrarius brings up some very real statistics. These are accurate and well
stated. Unfortunately many/most people are unaware of intersex people because
we have systematically eliminated them form society with a shroud of secrecy and
surgical mutilation to create something "normal" that people can accept.
It is ludicrous to state that this is a small, minute, minority...that should
be ignored. If LGBT people are 10% ish of the population, and Intersex babies
are 1 in 100 (5 surgeries a day are being performed in the US to alter these
people) and we don't even count those who must remain in the closet for
safety reason...I'm sorry but I don't call this a minute,
insignificant number of people. It's big! How can we deny rights to this
many people?? Until you have lived close to people in this population you
cannot understand. Signed, Mother of a transgender teen, and daughter of a
lesbian mother (BTW I was not raised by my mother, because she was taken away
from me, in case someone assumed that she influenced any of my views).
I couldn't even finish this article, it was so offensive to me! What a
filthy mind this person has! This is part of the problem. When it comes to gay
people or transgender people, people have a tendency to think about the most
filthy things! What nerve! I am tired of the filthy things people imply! Good
Mormons who are quick to point out how sacred their lives and marriages are! I
don't imagine that any of them would appreciate somebody thinking about
their intimate lives and what they do sexually and all the other garbage that
people dwell on when they talk about us!Your dirty, filthy thoughts are your own
and if you took time to know a few people, you would understand that it
doesn't work that way! Don't worry, I am sure they are not going into
the bathroom to do something filthy. This stinks!
Question for you BadgerbadgerMurray, UT10:47 p.m. Nov. 6,
2013-- If cats are spade or neutered, Are they
still Cats?BTW, one other thing...thanks for the laughs.
@Badgerbadger --"Deniers, there are many many many attacks in
public use bathrooms."Including attacks against transgendered
people.2012 -- A transgendered woman was slashed with a straight
razor at a fast food restaurant after using the women's bathroom, by a guy
shouting anti-gay slurs.Between January 2010 and 2012 --
"Statistics on such incidents are hard to come by, but a staffer for the
Chelsea-based Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund said that since
January 2010, the group has fielded 89 calls from around the country from
transgender people who were barred from using the restroom of their choice or
had acts of violence committed against them when they tried to do so. More than
half of these calls were made from New York City, TLDEF staffer Noah Lewis said.
""And more than half of participants in a 2011 study
conducted by the National Center for Transgender Equality and National Gay and
Lesbian Task Force reported being harassed in public accommodations like
restaurants, stores, hotels and hospitals. ""Nearly 10
percent reported being physically attacked. "Attacks in
bathrooms only make a stronger argument for building safer bathrooms -- not for
keeping transgendered people out of them.
@ Badgerbadger: You are absolutely right - people in public restrooms are
attacked, molested, spied upon - so any claims that this legislation will create
those situations are red-herrings. As for Chris B thinking he is a
dinosaur or a cat thinking it is human - such claims show a clear lack of
knowledge and understanding of this issue. Additionally, Chris' on-going
references to thinking he is a dinosaur are mocking in tone to individuals who
do have serious mental health issues, and should not be allowed on this thread
as they not only muddy the waters by mixing two separate issues, but are rude
The Deseret News used to be a quality newspaper, reporting the news, but
it's gone to the dogs.
To Open Minded MormonPeople are jobless, People are homeless,
People are starving, People are dying, The rich get richer,
The poor are getting poorer, And people are worrying about
legalizing a process for a boy to use the girls bathroom or locker room because
he "thinks" he is a girl? What a waste of time.
Kalindra- "such claims show a clear lack of knowledge and understanding of
this issue." No. A person can be completely knowledgeable and
understanding of something and still not be a believer.From the
posts it looks like the believers and non-believers are about evenly split. No
need to insult the other half. They just believe differently. Show some
@Copy Cat --"From the posts it looks like the believers and
non-believers are about evenly split. No need to insult the other half. They
just believe differently. Show some tolerance!"People have every
right to believe as they wish.But people do NOT have any right to
make something up and pretend that it's fact.
"But people do NOT have any right to make something up and pretend that
it's fact."au contraire Contrar---You do it all
the time. For example 1 in 10 people is homosexual, a huge lie you present as a
fact, which is not true in the general population, but only in very select
communities. And there is a huge difference between presenting an
obvious parody (dinosaur, cat) and pretending false numbers are
'facts'. The former parodies have no intent to deceive, but falsified
stats have every intent to deceive.
It's a very thorny issue. It seems we are frequently faced with thorny
issues we need to address. And we will. Mrs. Ruzicka has raised a question that
needs discussing as well. My concern is that I see within her writings and
pronouncements that her approach to this issue is completely devoid of
compassion. Until we get there, all we do is argue.
@Copy Cat --"You do it all the time."Nope."1 in 10 people is homosexual, a huge lie you present as a
fact"I have never said any such thing.In reality,
best estimates indicate that roughly 5% of the population is LGBT. That's 1
in 20. I have cited that number many times, because it's true.Please -- if you're going to accuse me of lying about something, or even
of just getting my facts wrong, at least have some evidence to back up your
accusations."And there is a huge difference between presenting
an obvious parody (dinosaur, cat) and pretending false numbers are
'facts'. "The "parodies", as you put it, set
forth by folks like Chris and Badgerbadger, imply (or claim outright) that
transsexuals are comparable to people who imagine themselves to be dinosaurs --
or cats who imagine themselves to be people. In reality, there are many
factually provable reasons why such comparisons are false. And since several of
those reasons have been presented to Chris and Badgerbadger multiple times
already, one is left with the inescapable conclusion that they are intentionally
putting forth false claims of comparison, knowing them to be false.
Re:Open Minded MormonDon't you have jobless, homeless,
starving, dying, rich, and poor people to think about?
There are many different conflicting statistics out there as to how many people
are LGBT. Kinsey's reports suggested that 10% reported being gay. Other
statistics say 2-5%. But, we are talking about transgender here, which estimates
to be another 2-5% of the population. If you add those numbers together you get
4-10%. Then the bisexual piece is added, and I found statistics anywhere from
.07 to 4%, or Kinsey's numbers of 37% of men and 13% of women. Who knows
how accurate any of these numbers are for sure because people who are LGBT are
afraid for their safety and livelihood to come out and say. There is surely a
very large number of this community that is under reporting. My point is no
matter how many people there are, they are all people, and we cannot deny rights
and protections to anyone. Everyone deserves the same human rights.
Whether anyone believes the validity of whether a person is transgender or not,
these people are still out there, and historically always have been. You
don't have to understand it, or believe it. If people don't feel
comfortable with a trans person using the regular facilities then provide a
gender neutral bathroom/shower, that serves gender neutral people and families.
Many of us would never recognize most trans people anyway.
It is obvious that many people who comment here have not read the entire article
nor have they pondered the consequences. Having a private stall, or cubicle, or
porta-pottie is NOT the real issue. The issue as to do with no doors, not
cubicle, NO privacy situations, especially showers. And for the record, any
lawmaker regardless of party identifications who introduces or supports this
nonsense should be removed as quickly as possible, shame on the voters for
voting for them.
@Smitty1400 --"Having a private stall, or cubicle, or
porta-pottie is NOT the real issue. The issue as to do with no doors, not
cubicle, NO privacy situations, especially showers. "Why should
ANYONE be forced into no-privacy situations?This seems to be a
failure in locker room construction rather than an actual problem with admitting
I liked the comment Michael Medved made on his radio show about the California
law. I suspect that there are a bunch of high school boys in California saying
to themselves 'I wonder how many days I will have to wear a dress before I
can check out the girls locker room?'"
@Charlemagne --"I suspect that there are a bunch of high school
boys in California saying to themselves 'I wonder how many days I will have
to wear a dress before I can check out the girls locker room?'""Do you really think that any high school boy will be willing to expose
himself to the ridicule of his entire class by calling himself a girl, just so
he can switch bathrooms? Seriously??