Pastor uses incident as teaching moment to bolster sensitivity
Excellent article regarding a real concern I've had for years. Certain
words, used to insult others in sports will never be okay. These racial
slur's meanings don't culturally change. Also, I really have a problem
when guys (boys or men) who want to insult another male athlete, so they use a
variety of negative words that are used to describe women. Sometimes they use
these terms to fully insult the opposition, and other times are used in a,
"buddy," kind of format. Please knock it off! There are many
highly-skilled female athletes out there that really deserve respect. Thanks
Good article. I totally agree. As an elementary child I use to us the
"eeny meeny" phrase to start some games. I had no idea who an African
American was. Later I moved to a different community and one of my best friends
was African American. My parents taught me not to use the "n" word. It
wasn't until I started teaching school in Layton when I heard some black
kids using it with each other. I challenged them on it and they said it was
okay so long as you were black. I definitely agree with Mr. Davis. I
don't think there is a right time to use the word. It carries with it too
many connotations of disrespect from the past. There are a lot of words that
are disrespectful to different people. We need to be sensitive to them by how
we speak. Thanks again for the article.Gary
Sticks and stones can brake my bones but names can never hurt me.
I was a little offended by saying it is different in the "South"? Since,
I live in a majority black neighborhood and city it is still a word most people
find offensive anywhere. There are also many racial slurs against whites that I
hear on a regular basis that are equally offensive. It has been and continues to
be the Policital Class that divides our Nation for their gain. We are all just
plain Americans. Don't allow those that use Race to gain power to divide
Slurs of any type are wrong, whether they are based on race, religion, national
or regional origin, gender, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status, age,
political affiliation...whatever. Sadly, we live in a mean-spirited world and
we all need to take a close look inside ourselves and do a painful and honest
inventory of ways we can improve in how we treat others around us. I know I have
had to do that and I still do. Based on what I read, see, and hear, the need is
Will there ever be a way of stopping the use of slang and slurs from being used
in derogatory ways? Probably not, but it is great that there was a large seminar
to deal with this type of insensitivity and to create a better atmosphere of
sportsmanship. Well done.
I too was raised with the ethic that racial slurs were tantamount to any other
profanity and thus, mouth-wash worthy.However, I think that we have
now gone too far in the opposite direction, to the point where we can only refer
to profanity in ways similar to spelling out "bad" words while in the
company of children.If we have prohibited the expression of
profanity even when used in a context that is intended to only be informative
and/or instructive and not the least offensive, then we have succumbed to the
dumbing-down process that starts with the ridiculous and hurtful of using these
words offensively.I view making --all-- uses of these words,
irrespective of intend, as just another side of the same coin of stupidity, and
therefore equally offensive.
3 years ago my son-in-law was coaching a 9 year old team for his son in Spanish
Fork. Half way through the 3rd period one of his players turned to a boy of
African ancestry and called him the N-word. A player from the other
team pushed the foul-mouthed boy and the coaches raced to stop the melee from
escalating. He led his boys back to the bench to find out what happened.
Reluctantly the boys told the whole story. The offender denied he did anything
but the rest said he did it. The parents overheard and started shouting to the
coach to not make a big deal about it. My son-in-law, who was all-state center
in basketball went over to the other coach and apologized for the bad behavior
and then forfeited the game. The boy's parents were furious
when he quietly asked the offending boy to apologize for his slur. The boy was
indignant and stomp off the court to be with his parents. The rest of the
parents congratulated the coach for so strongly emphasizing that this kind of
behavior is intolerable. I am still proud of him.
@George of the Jungle: When I was a child, I used to invoke that "stick and
stones" quote as a defense mechanism; however, it never worked for me.
Hurtful words hurt. I like this quote from the Apocrypha of the 1611 Authorized
King James Version of the Holy Bible:Ecclesiasticus 28:17 –
1817 The stroke of the whip maketh marks in the flesh, but the
stroke of the tongue breaketh the bones.18 Many have fallen by the edge of
the sword: but not so many as have fallen by the tongue.
@Montana Mormon"Slurs of any type are wrong, whether they are
based on race, religion, national or regional origin, gender, sexual
orientation, socioeconomic status, age, political
affiliation...whatever."I find your post a little ironic
considering your username contains the word "Mormon", which is a slur
used by enemies of the LDS Church to describe its members. True, church members
have adopted it to some degree which has taken a bit of the sting out of it
(similar to how some African-Americans have adopted the n-word into their
lexicon), but it doesn't change the fact that the word "Mormon" is
a religious slur.If you want to get on a high horse about the use of
slurs, maybe you should remove the one that's in your username.
Brave Sir Robin: I don't see "Mormon" as a slur. I don't find
offense with the term "Mormon Tabernacle Choir." Sorry to disagree with
you. Yes, it was a slur in the earlier days of the Church, but the connotation
We must teach respect, civility, and tolerance to our children and hold them
accountable in their actions. However, watching more and more adults in our
society in political and religous settings give me little hope. I do applaud
the actions of those invovled in this story. It's an example of adults
being the adults.
A word from President David O. McKay on using words...Boys flying
kites haul in their white winged birds,But you can't do that when
you're flying words.Thoughts sometimes unexpressed often lie back
dead,But even God can't kill them once they're said.
My wife and I remember when our oldest daughter started hearing the word
"retarded" being used at school, as a demeaning slur. We were very proud
of how she confronted the perpetrators, as we have a severely handicapped son,
with both Down Syndrome and cerebral palsy. She was very offended, and
rightfully so. However, we were quite saddened to hear a young women's
leader use it in church, in apparent attempt to be more popular and conventional
with the young women. I think there are other educational opportunities as well.
The only way to prevent this is within our homes as we teach our children that
this is not acceptable. Also in our communities when situations arise such as
mentioned in a sporting event above. We can't make laws and regulations
against such things we just need to fix it as it happens.
So many times I hear stuff like "its a cultural thing" as a way for
minority races to exclude white people from feeling like they have the political
authority or ability to do anything about a situation without being called a
racist or a bigot. Let me ask you who is the party practicing racism when the
excuse "its a cultural thing" is used? Isn't that the same
argument the white slave owners used to argue why black people were no good for
anything other than slavery? Wake up people.
One clue about the use of language ought to be:Is this use available
to all or is it limited to one segment of our society?Another
Clue:Is this language considered demeaning to the target, or could
it cause concern for others who overhear but are not targeted?In
either of these cases, the use should be avoided. I guess most will notice that
these two rules would apply to a lot more than just culturally sensitive
language and, if followed, would lead to a reduction of crude, insensitive, and
demeaning language. It might also result in more civilized rhetoric and less
name calling of any kind. Lets hope for that.
From President Gordon B. Hinckley:"Racial strife still lifts its
ugly head. I am advised that even right here among us there is some of this. I
cannot understand how it can be. It seemed to me that we all rejoiced in the
1978 revelation given President Kimball. I was there in the temple at the time
that that happened. There was no doubt in my mind or in the minds of my
associates that what was revealed was the mind and the will of the Lord. Now I
am told that racial slurs and denigrating remarks are sometimes heard among us.
I remind you that no man who makes disparaging remarks concerning those of
another race can consider himself a true disciple of Christ. Nor can he consider
himself to be in harmony with the teachings of the Church of Christ. . . .
Brethren, there is no basis for racial hatred among the priesthood of this
Church. If any within the sound of my voice is inclined to indulge in this, then
let him go before the Lord and ask for forgiveness and be no more involved in
@mattmoYes obviously we should teach our kids in our homes that this
is not acceptable. The problem is that inside many homes there are still racist
views being shared and condoned that are hidden from public view until it leaks
out like we had in this story. We may not want to admit it or address it, but
it's very real and prominent nonetheless.
I certainly don't accept the use of "the N-word" but I wish there
were as much concern over other "swear words" that are not racially
charged but that are at least as repugnant and hateful and "forms of
bullying. Wouldn't it be nice if we educated our children with equal vigor
about those words?
What exactly are swear words? Someone made them up. You can't find them
in the Bible, except for the use of taking the name of the Lord in vain. Racial
slurs are a whole different story, and meant to demean!
Thank you xscribe
It would be well for minorities not to jokingly use those slurs among
themselves. It lends an air of legitimacy to terms that can spill over to others
and result in bad situations.